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Tenderizer 1019:


Wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of guys at a backyard barbecue came up with the idea to build a fighting robot to play tricks and agitate the neighborhood… as well as mow the lawn? No. Turns out it wasn’t funny at all because these dudes programmed their new suburban troublemaker with all of their worst “guy” qualities. The result was a boorish remote controlled robot… made from lawnmower model 1019 and spare grill parts! It consumed large quantities of grilled meat, belched, farted, laughed loudly at stupid jokes and fell asleep on the sofa. Then it helped itself to some of the Tenderizer’s Secret Sauce and BBQ-ed its own circuitry.

 

Now this fighting robot has gone renegade, fleeing the backyard and destroying whole city blocks with its bad attitude and mace fist. And it has an appetite for destruction that only a rack of honey-glazed ribs can satisfy. Check that. Even food can no longer satisfy this propane-powered juggernaut jerk of spare lawn mower parts. Our only hope is that another boxing robot can stand up to him and fillet his throttle mechanism.

Doctor NineBrain:

 

Doctor NineBrain was known as the greatest mind of his generation, able to compute infinite data effortlessly with nothing more than sheer brain power. But when a fatal illness threatened to cut his gifted life short, he spent his remaining days constructing a robot to house his superior brain. After eight unsuccessful attempts, the professor’s health gave out. His team transplanted his brain into one last cybernetic cyborg. The result was a creature of dazzling intellect, with an extremely short temper—the worst combo for a battle robot.

 

The robot’s bad temper wrecked the lab. Then the machine took to the streets to conquer and prove that supreme intelligence and formidable power can work together to achieve great destruction.

Data Rate:


There comes a time in everyone’s lives when a job becomes just too boring, frustrating or routine to take. When job burnout sets in, the results aren’t pretty. Crazy thing is, it even happens to computers. Back in the 1980s, a K-86 punch card processor dreamed of bigger and better things, of having greater processing speeds and advanced analytics. When one more lame punch card put him over the edge, he threw a cog and bolted. He hid out in the labs of the most gifted computer engineers and stole circuitry and data, making himself stronger, smarter, faster and meaner than ever.

 

Now Data Rate is out to prove himself to other computer forms. And he’ll do it by taking them out one by one. No PC, smartphone, laptop, or food processor is safe from the wrath of this one-time simple punch card reader.   This Big Robot is ready to fight.

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Wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of guys at a backyard barbecue came up with the idea to build a fighting robot to play tricks and agitate the neighborhood… as well as mow the lawn? No. Turns out it wasn’t funny at all because these dudes programmed their new suburban troublemaker with all of their worst “guy” qualities. The result was a boorish remote controlled robot… made from lawnmower model 1019 and spare grill parts! It consumed large quantities of grilled meat, belched, farted, laughed loudly at stupid jokes and fell asleep on the sofa. Then it helped itself to some of the Tenderizer’s Secret Sauce and BBQ-ed its own circuitry.

 

Now this fighting robot has gone renegade, fleeing the backyard and destroying whole city blocks with its bad attitude and mace fist. And it has an appetite for destruction that only a rack of honey-glazed ribs can satisfy. Check that. Even food can no longer satisfy this propane-powered juggernaut jerk of spare lawn mower parts. Our only hope is that another boxing robot can stand up to him and fillet his throttle mechanism.

Doctor NineBrain was known as the greatest mind of his generation, able to compute infinite data effortlessly with nothing more than sheer brain power. But when a fatal illness threatened to cut his gifted life short, he spent his remaining days constructing a robot to house his superior brain. After eight unsuccessful attempts, the professor’s health gave out. His team transplanted his brain into one last cybernetic cyborg. The result was a creature of dazzling intellect, with an extremely short temper—the worst combo for a battle robot.

 

The robot’s bad temper wrecked the lab. Then the machine took to the streets to conquer and prove that supreme intelligence and formidable power can work together to achieve great destruction.

There comes a time in everyone’s lives when a job becomes just too boring, frustrating or routine to take. When job burnout sets in, the results aren’t pretty. Crazy thing is, it even happens to computers. Back in the 1980s, a K-86 punch card processor dreamed of bigger and better things, of having greater processing speeds and advanced analytics. When one more lame punch card put him over the edge, he threw a cog and bolted. He hid out in the labs of the most gifted computer engineers and stole circuitry and data, making himself stronger, smarter, faster and meaner than ever.

 

Now Data Rate is out to prove himself to other computer forms. And he’ll do it by taking them out one by one. No PC, smartphone, laptop, or food processor is safe from the wrath of this one-time simple punch card reader.   This Big Robot is ready to fight.

There comes a time in everyone’s lives when a job becomes just too boring, frustrating or routine to take. When job burnout sets in, the results aren’t pretty. Crazy thing is, it even happens to computers. Back in the 1980s, a K-86 punch card processor dreamed of bigger and better things, of having greater processing speeds and advanced analytics. When one more lame punch card put him over the edge, he threw a cog and bolted. He hid out in the labs of the most gifted computer engineers and stole circuitry and data, making himself stronger, smarter, faster and meaner than ever.

 

Now Data Rate is out to prove himself to other computer forms. And he’ll do it by taking them out one by one. No PC, smartphone, laptop, or food processor is safe from the wrath of this one-time simple punch card reader.   This Big Robot is ready to fight.

There comes a time in everyone’s lives when a job becomes just too boring, frustrating or routine to take. When job burnout sets in, the results aren’t pretty. Crazy thing is, it even happens to computers. Back in the 1980s, a K-86 punch card processor dreamed of bigger and better things, of having greater processing speeds and advanced analytics. When one more lame punch card put him over the edge, he threw a cog and bolted. He hid out in the labs of the most gifted computer engineers and stole circuitry and data, making himself stronger, smarter, faster and meaner than ever.

 

Now Data Rate is out to prove himself to other computer forms. And he’ll do it by taking them out one by one. No PC, smartphone, laptop, or food processor is safe from the wrath of this one-time simple punch card reader.   This Big Robot is ready to fight.

Wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of guys at a backyard barbecue came up with the idea to build a fighting robot to play tricks and agitate the neighborhood… as well as mow the lawn? No. Turns out it wasn’t funny at all because these dudes programmed their new suburban troublemaker with all of their worst “guy” qualities. The result was a boorish remote controlled robot… made from lawnmower model 1019 and spare grill parts! It consumed large quantities of grilled meat, belched, farted, laughed loudly at stupid jokes and fell asleep on the sofa. Then it helped itself to some of the Tenderizer’s Secret Sauce and BBQ-ed its own circuitry.

 

Now this fighting robot has gone renegade, fleeing the backyard and destroying whole city blocks with its bad attitude and mace fist. And it has an appetite for destruction that only a rack of honey-glazed ribs can satisfy. Check that. Even food can no longer satisfy this propane-powered juggernaut jerk of spare lawn mower parts. Our only hope is that another boxing robot can stand up to him and fillet his throttle mechanism.

Doctor NineBrain was known as the greatest mind of his generation, able to compute infinite data effortlessly with nothing more than sheer brain power. But when a fatal illness threatened to cut his gifted life short, he spent his remaining days constructing a robot to house his superior brain. After eight unsuccessful attempts, the professor’s health gave out. His team transplanted his brain into one last cybernetic cyborg. The result was a creature of dazzling intellect, with an extremely short temper—the worst combo for a battle robot.

 

The robot’s bad temper wrecked the lab. Then the machine took to the streets to conquer and prove that supreme intelligence and formidable power can work together to achieve great destruction.

Wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of guys at a backyard barbecue came up with the idea to build a fighting robot to play tricks and agitate the neighborhood… as well as mow the lawn? No. Turns out it wasn’t funny at all because these dudes programmed their new suburban troublemaker with all of their worst “guy” qualities. The result was a boorish remote controlled robot… made from lawnmower model 1019 and spare grill parts! It consumed large quantities of grilled meat, belched, farted, laughed loudly at stupid jokes and fell asleep on the sofa. Then it helped itself to some of the Tenderizer’s Secret Sauce and BBQ-ed its own circuitry.

 

Now this fighting robot has gone renegade, fleeing the backyard and destroying whole city blocks with its bad attitude and mace fist. And it has an appetite for destruction that only a rack of honey-glazed ribs can satisfy. Check that. Even food can no longer satisfy this propane-powered juggernaut jerk of spare lawn mower parts. Our only hope is that another boxing robot can stand up to him and fillet his throttle mechanism.

Doctor NineBrain was known as the greatest mind of his generation, able to compute infinite data effortlessly with nothing more than sheer brain power. But when a fatal illness threatened to cut his gifted life short, he spent his remaining days constructing a robot to house his superior brain. After eight unsuccessful attempts, the professor’s health gave out. His team transplanted his brain into one last cybernetic cyborg. The result was a creature of dazzling intellect, with an extremely short temper—the worst combo for a battle robot.

 

The robot’s bad temper wrecked the lab. Then the machine took to the streets to conquer and prove that supreme intelligence and formidable power can work together to achieve great destruction.